I can’t believe I was so foolish.
You’d think that I would’ve known better than to think that my parents would just have this figured out. They don’t have the slightest idea of the world that I live in everyday, and the constant reminders that are sent my way to continue to push me outside.
And how desperately I need them to stand up to that misogynistic, only slightly-veiled homophobic brother of mine.
His behaviour is insulting and threatening.
And my parents tell me that he will change his behaviour if I tell him that I find it insulting, or degrading, or hurtful. If I tell him I am gay, then he will know not to behave in the manner that he does around me.
My question is whether or not his behaviour around me matters that much – and why knowing I am gay should change his behaviour in any considerable way. Shouldn’t he being expected to have the integrity to act like a respectful person regardless?
My brother will only find out I am gay when my wedding approaches. And that is if I send him an invitation.
Until then, he will continue to make comments like this:
“The only reason a guy hangs out with that many women is to chase tail.”
And after my wedding, he will no longer make comments like that around me.
Which, really, brings to question whether or not telling him is worth it. Is it my job to change people, even those who are close to me, or should I just expect that people should get the sensitivity of oppression without being told?